Yeah, actually we probably want to be all of those things. Unfortunately, all of those objectives work against each other. With the exception of being rich. Which is just hard to do but likely not worth it.
I would like to be famous and loved, but there will always be greener fields. There will always be someone instantly better at something that I have tried years to master. My happiness will fade, love will too. There is not one thing I can hold onto and take solace of as being my own. I am, ultimately, the master of nothing.
This is a hard turd to swallow. I don't even fully believe it. Even though I know it's true. This world is full of sorrow. We are born into a world that we must leave, we bring nothing in at our birth and carry nothing with us beyond our death. the accomplishments of my life amount to nothing more that a hill of mud. I might have a really big hill, but its effing mud so its going to erode back into the puddle it came from. Somebody will come along and make a new hill, maybe even directly on top of mine. Not knowing that I had lived, or carrying that I have died.
So why try. All glory/love/happiness is fleeting. Why have a moral code in a world that doesn't demand it and is impartial to its existence. The irrationality is the part that is utterly beautiful in the matter. The fact that the pursuit of any internal strata of goals is so unnecessary and loosely encouraged just lends to its aura. Through applying it maybe others will feel that there burdens are less heavy, and everyone can partake in the ruse that is immortality. Maybe better described as eternity. We live to help ourselves and others feel the rapture at the success. Making that mud hill as high as you can. Its still pretty cool to make a really big hill of mud.
but that is all it's made of. And there's a bigger mud hill across the swamp
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