why am I sad?

I recently did not succeed at something. I was not initially upset, I saw it coming, yet for some reason it started to bother me later. I believe that the reason for this was from the response I got from people when I informed them of my failure. Not that my friends treated me poorly, because they actually treated me quite well. Something one certainly hopes for in friends. They treated me rather warmly, as they accept my failure and they addressed we in a way that said "I still want me to be your friend."

I'm not sure how this makes me feel. These people act with the best of intentions, yet through their treatment of me, I see myself through their eyes. What makes it a problem is that their image of me does not fit with my own. I can internally justify my problems and build up my self esteem through my dirty little personality tricks I'm not going to teach you. However, when looking through their eyes I see myself as less of an island and more of an impressionable, and somewhat pitiful case.

The worst part is, I constructed the me that's in my head. So, is that self an ideal and elaborate illusion that I have fooled myself into believing? Or is the pity I receive merely misplaced by well intentioned people? I am rather certain that the answer is a mixture of the both.

Bamabii's response:

Stop trying to pretend you are introspective. Your just sad you failed and are trying to justify it with the little bit you remember from Psychology class.

My Response:

yeah. I guess the most important takeaway from this is that I have problems with my Self esteem and need consistent reasurment of how good I am.

Bamabii's response:

You slept through the majority of Psychology class.

My Response:

Fine, I'm just a sad panda :(